Message from a Hostel – Old Cars or New Shoes

Alistair why does everyone in this town drive old cars?  Look at the licence plates they all say “Collector” does that mean they are from the Collector General’s Office.  Hay do you think Alistair they get them from the social welfare services?  Do you think the Government here gives the poor people those old looking cars?  Nora I don’t understand what you are on about.

Alistair could you apply for a car?  You could ask for a new model one of those trucks they sell here.  You know the ones when you pull up beside them all you see are big feckin wheels and they sound like a John Deere tractor racing up a feckin hill backwards.  You can tell them Alistair that you don’t mind the Collector General’s office having his name on your plate.

Nora I think you got it all wrong they don’t get those old cars free from the Government they buy them because they are old.  Well Alistair you would think they would buy new cars then, they must not have the money for new ones.  No Nora they are Collector’s items, people buy them to show them off.  Well feck that Alistair I have heard it all now collecting feckin old cars.  Nora it is like women collecting shoes.  Ah!  Alistair women are smart they collect new shoes not old shoes and they definitely don’t collect feckin old cars.