Anything to Declare?
Nora what has happened to the world, gone are the days when you could bring a few old Galtee rashers, some Clonakilty black pudding and good old Denny’s sausages to your friends out foreign. What are you on about Alistair? Nora do you not remember whenever you were heading out foreign your Ma or your Da would hand you a package wrap in old newspaper to stick in your luggage for your uncles or aunties. Sure remember the time you bought the rings of white & black pudding on Moore Street to send to Eccie Hubbard in England and you left them sitting on the train on your way home.
I had some rashers and black pudding for my old friend Joe and when I landed off the plane and went into the airport baggage hall wasn’t there this big feckin dog chewing on my suitcase. Hey I shouted get that feckin dog away from me black pudding. Next thing Nora there was about three big officers hauling me off with all my luggage, the feckin dog was still hanging out of my suitcase.
They kept me in this little room watching me through a two way mirror. Then this very official bloke comes into the room with my half chewed up suitcase, bangs it on the table and asks me to open it. When I opened the suitcase, sure all that was in it was your clothes and red snow boots that I was bringing back for you. He took out your red boots and looked inside he turn them upside down and onto the table fell all the rashers and black pudding.
Well he says, have you anything to say about this, yes says I they belong to Joe and I have an official document here called Anything to Declare, right beside the meat products box there was a big X marked and I had written beside it –Galtee rashers and Clonakilty black pudding for Joe.
Well Alastair they obviously let you go, yes Nora after a lot more explaining about all the women’s clothes in my luggage. I would say they are all now tucking into a full Irish Breakfast in the airport staff canteen.
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