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Category: Message from a Hostel

The True Story of King Henry VIII – Adventures of Doc Higgins

IT IS OUT The second book in the series of  The Adventures of Doc Higgins. Read the true story of King Henry VIII and his pow wow with Doc Higgins and the Manager. Alistair and Nora are up to their ol’ tricks when they are introduced to Paddy MacCatchim the real 007. Currently on Sale  Contact via www.melclifford.com Soon to be on Amazon Kindle ebook  

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Back in the Saddle for Sure!

The finding show there has been 100% increase in bicycle theft across the Canadian border. The key factor in the increase has been laid directly at the feet of Donald Trump.

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My New Bicycle, you are not going to believe this!

So here’s the thing, half the world knows about the saga of the fecker(s) who stole me bicycle a good few weeks ago and the other half of the world who don’t, were caught up with Donald Trump watching and worrying how high the Mexican pole vault and the fosberry flop teams could jump during the Olympics. Well, I sitting in the Library working on the edits for the next book in the series The Adventures of Doc Higgins, ‘Time Beyond Here’.  I’m working on the piece where back in 1530’s the Archbishop of Canterbury asks the Doc to say a few words at a funeral and in the Doc’s usual style, he steps up and over the body he says “In the name of the father, the son and into the hole he goes” Just then, I look out the window and I see me new bicycle (the one Joey had the fundraiser for and shipped all the way to me from Ireland) on the feckin ground. How did that happen I ask me self? It still had my new ‘leave me bike alone lock’ as in the photo. So, I shout down my computer and got ready to head for home. You are not going to believe this, some feckin bastard(s) stole the feckin saddle off me bicycle, YES the feckin saddle.  I had to cycle home as if my arse was on fire and I was anxious to see what was over the next hill. Not to think what was going to happen if I tried to sit down. I looked like one of the hobes’ on 5 years old kids bike. The only thing I was missing was a baseball cap hanging off the side of me head and me underpants on display. Where do I go from here, I ask me self? Me feckin bicycle saddle gone – I could understand if this was in the 1800’s, went one could go out into the wilderness and find a feckin horse to but a saddle on, but come on, its 2016.    

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Message from a Hostel – Second book in the series underway?

“Hot Apple pie ye all,” shouted Ms Patsy, just as Mossy walked into the room. Firstly, thanks to you the readers for all the emails looking for the next chapter in the current story about Alistair & Nora, Doc Higgins and The Manager. How will Alistair and Nora they get out of Town?  Will their Shebeen get back on the road? Will the Doc save them once again?  What’s the manager up to now? For all of you that have been waiting so patiently – the bad news is, you will have to wait a little long – the GREAT news is, that the final chapters will be in my second book in the series, The Adventures of Doc Higgins. The release date is set the first quarter of 2016. My writing styles have been preoccupied with the upcoming release of my new business book (The Editor is still reviewing the Title) and an audio recording of the children series The Tales of Scallywagwag and Winkiewoo. Not taking into the account the upcoming re-launch of the second edition of Poetry Just for You in print and on Amazon Kindle. And you thought I was relaxing? Stay tuned and thanks for all the continued support. Thanks again. Kind Regards Mel

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Message from a Hostel – Hot Apple Pie, Ye all?

“I feel it in my waters Nora, something’s amiss here.” “Quit would you and let’s head down to dinner.” “Well glad you all can join us,” said Ms. Patsy. “Alistair if you would like to take a seat over there and Nora if you would like to sit here, I am sure the others will not mind if it gets too crowed at the table.” Alistair and Nora took their seats.  Alistair was on one side of the table and Nora was further down on the other side. The table was set for eight others, yet only Alistair and Nora were seated at this time. “Well, as I said I’m glad you are all here and ready to eat.  I’ll serve our guests first, as you all are regulars here.” “Shall we wait for the others Ms. Patsy?” asked Alistair. “Oh stop being funny with that crazy accent of yours, they are all here.” “Will you be wanting your usual helping Mr. Cassidy, or will you be saving yourself for my Apple pie?” Alistair again looked around the table as Ms. Patsy served out food to all the other place settings, but he could only see himself and Nora at the table.  Ms. Patsy spoke to each empty place setting before she dished out the food. “Who’s next to you there Nora,” Alistair enquired.  “As I think I have Mr. Cassidy on one side and Roger Rabbit on the other.” “Ms. Patsy may I ask who’s that gentleman at the end of the table.” “Why that’s Mr. William McCarthy Alistair, but we all call him Billy.” “And the nice lady next to him?” “That’s the lovely Miss Oakley” Ms. Patsy headed back into the kitchen. “Nora, she is off her feckin head.  I knew there was something amiss here.” “Alistair, she maybe a wee bit odd, but what of it.  You just chat away to Mr Cassidy and enjoy your dinner, while I have the craic here with Mr. Masterson and Miss Oakley.” Ms. Patsy arrived back offering seconds. “Great to see you are all getting on so well – I can’t hear myself in the kitchen with all the chit chattering going on in here.  Nice to have a full house again.   Before you two arrived it was like talking to myself with this lot.   I’ll be serving the apple pie soon folks, so don’t be stuffing your cake holes with all them lovely grits.” “Holy feck Nora, I knew when I met her first and looked into those eyes of hers – there was nobody driving” Alistair, sure what the feck, the room is okay and the food is good and sure the place is booked out, weren’t we lucky to get a room at all, Nora laughed. “This is only the beginning Nora, most of these guys around the table were notorious outlaws in their day.  Would you listen to me – I’m feckin acknowledging that they are here.” If you can’t beat it Alistair you might as well join in on the craic. “Hot Apple pie ya all,” shouted Ms. Patsy, just as Mossy walked into the room. To be continued….. Photo thanks to youtube.com

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Message from a Hostel – I feel it in me waters?

When they reached the room, Ms. Patsy flung the door open. “Be the holy feck,” said Nora. “It’s Elvis feckin Presley.” “Elvis is alive, I feckin knew it!” –shouted Alistair. “No you ijet, it’s only the room that is all decked out with Elvis memorabilia. Have a look Alistair.” Ms. Patsy then joined in and said, “all my rooms are decorated with different themes, I have the Buddy Holly room, the Glen Millar, the Jimmy Hendrix, the John Denver and the Marlene Monroe Suite. I will let you pair get settle in and if you wish to dine with us this evening, dinner is at 7:30pm.” Ms. Patsy headed off down the corridor and Alistair and Nora settled into their room. “Funny how all the rooms are named after dead people,” said Alistair. “Look at all this stuff about Elvis, all his record labels and posters. What do you think this carving on the wood means? – Don’t believe what you see – get out now while you can. They don’t seem like lyrics from any of his songs. “Hey Nora did you see that?” “What Alistair?” “The eyes in that painting of Elvis on the wall over the bed, his eyes moved. I swear it Nora.” “Alistair you are imagining things.” “I don’t think so Nora – they did move. I’m just going to stand here till it happens again.” “Alistair, come on, let’s go for dinner. Tomorrow we can see what the town has to offer and check out the work on the Shebeen with Mossy.” “Something very strange going on around here Nora. Rooms named after dead people, moving eyes in the paintings, yes Nora very strange.” “Quit your nonsense and let’s go to dinner.” “I feel it in me waters Nora, something amiss here.” To be continued………

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Message from a Hostel – Can we see the room?

“Might be more than a week, you could head on over to the hotel El Dorado. Tell Ms Patsy that Mossy sent ya.” Nora and Alistair headed over to the hotel to settle in for the week.  When they arrived at the front desk Ms. Patsy was standing there with a big smile to greet them.  “Ya all looking for a room for the night,” she asked. “Have you a room for the week, our Shebeen is over at Mossy’s getting repaired? “ replied Nora. “Anything to serious?” she asked. “Not sure,” said Alistair.  “He has to send away for a new part.” “Oh! might look to see if I have a room for a month or two, it takes some time to get a part all the ways down here,” said Ms Patsy. “A month or two” shouted Nora. “That’s what I just said Mam, a month or two, and old Mossy isn’t the fastest mechanic in the land. Yes I a have a room, it will be $49 per night, but if you here for the long haul I can see my way letting ye have it for $39.” “Can we see the room?” asked Nora. “See it, well if ye see and don’t like it, ye might be looking a long time to find accommodation in this town.” “We will have a look first,” added Alistair. “Ye all very picky, so follow me.” Alistair and Nora did as they were commanded and followed Ms Patsy down a long corridor and up some old stairs. When they reach the room, Ms Patsy flung the door open. “Be the holy feck,” said Nora. To be continued

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Message from a Hostel – Is there a Cockney in Town?

Alistair and Nora walked onto the main street in search of a Shebeen garage.  On the corner of Main Street and Martin Luther King Avenue was a posted sign ‘MJ’ can fix it’ “Look Nora, a garage, let’s see if it’s open,” said Alistair. Nora and Alistair entered the garage court yard to be met by, well what can I say, what was before them stood about seven foot tall with no teeth and groaned a greeting. “My good man would you know if there is a Shebeen mechanic on the premises”, asked Alistair. To which came a groaning sound and something along the lines of “arrrrrrr that woo be me”. “That does not look or sound like a Cockney to me,” said Nora.  “The cockney I know has more charisma and style than this guy”. “Nora we need this man to look at the Shebeen for us.  To see if he can fix the whirring sound and the chugging along bit.” “My good fellow could you have a look at our whirring sound and the chugging along bit in our Shebeen,” asked Alistair. “Where be it parked,” asked the garage man. “It’s just outside town,” replied Alistair. “Let’s be getting there then.  Follow me to my truck.  By the way its fifty bucks just to go look.  If I can fix it on the spot it will be my time plus any parts it needs.  If I have to tow you back to the yard there’s a standard charge and then we can see what needs to be done,” informed the Garage man. Nora climbed into the back of the truck with Alistair.  It was the back of the truck as there was only the driver’s seat in the front cab.  They both sat on some old tool boxes.  “This guy sure knows how to lay out his charges”, said Nora. “Let’s hope it can be fixed on the road” replied Alistair. When they reached the Shebeen, the mechanic started it up and looked for a long while under the bonnet.  With a few shakes of his head and some more groaning sounds he turned to both Nora and Alistair and said.  “This machine is not going anywhere too far too soon.  Looks like her transmission needs attention.  I’ll have to get it back to the yard.  She’ll get there on her own steam, so you can save the towing change.” Alistair drove back to the garage.  When they reached the yard the mechanic took another look and hooked it up to his engine checking system. “The good news is I can fix it, the bad news, I don’t have the part.  The good news, I can get the part in a week, the bad news, it’s very expensive.” “With all this good news, bad news stuff and as it seems we are going to be sticking around a bit, does Mr. good/bad news have a name,” asked Nora. “Mam, they call me ‘Mossy Good News’ around here, but you can call me Mossy, “replied the Garage man. “Well Mossy, guess we better get ordering the part and get things started so we can move on.  If we are going to be here for a week is there a local hotel nearby?” asked Alistair. “Might be more than a week, you could head on over to the hotel El Dorado. Tell Ms Patsy that Mossy sent ya.” To be continued
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Message from a Hostel – Fog cleared

“Well Nora, the fog is cleared let’s move on,” said Alistair. “Fire up the old Shebeen Alistair,” replied Nora. With a quick turn of the key the Shebeen fired up and they were back on the road again. “Still got a whirring sound there Alistair, must be that ‘something’ you mentioned is going around and making a whirring sound again”. “Sure sounds like it Nora, kind of a musical sounding noise, matches the chugging movement.  I see the fog is back again”. “Look Alistair, tumble weed, isn’t it lovely the way it tumbles across the desert out there.  Not much traffic on this road”. “Its quiet out here except for the whirring sound and the lovely views Nora of the dancing tumble weed – there is no place like the middle of feckin nowhere.  I think it’s time for another cup of tea Nora.” Alistair pulled off the road again to let the fog clear. Just then in the distance there seemed to be movement along the road.  A dust trail approaching from the West.  As the vision became clearer it looked like a bunch of wild horses.  “Nora you grew up around horses, go catch a few of them,” shouted Alistair. Nora shot out of the Shebeen like a woman with a mission and ran towards the oncoming horses.  Shouting Ye Haw and waving her arms in the air. Nora had taken the water hoses from the Shebeen and made a lasso.  Within a few minutes Nora had the hose around the neck of a horse and was swinging herself onto it’s back.   Chasing after the herd, she managed to lasso two more and finally a forth horse. Trotting back towards the Shebeen with four large horses, Nora was ye hawing out loud. “Alistair we have some new horse power for the Shebeen”. Strapping the four horses to the front of the Shebeen, they were slowly on the move again.  After several slow moving hours they arrived at the edge of a small town. “Alistair, I don’t think we should drive these fine horses into the town.  They look quite Bolloxed from pulling the Shebeen this far,” said Nora Alistair and Nora released the horses and locked up the Shebeen before walking the rest of the way into the town. To be continued



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Message from a Hostel – What sound?

“Alistair what’s that whirring sound I hear?”  Nora asked as they travelled along the road. “What sound Nora” replied Alistair? “That whirring sound coming from the front of the Shebeen.  Don’t tell me you can’t hear it,” said Nora. “Oh!  That whirring sound that just started about a mile back,” answered Alistair. “It’s just something going around and making a whirring sound as it goes around Nora, no need to worry

 yet” “Does that sound have something to do with why the Shebeen is just chugging along?” asked Nora “Could be Nora, let’s not think about it and it might go away,” said Alistair. “Where are we now Alastair?” asked Nora. I think somewhere between by the time we get to Phoenix she will be rising and by the time she gets to Albuquerque she will be working,” sang Alistair. “You mean Alistair that from here it’s a long way to Tipperary.  It’s a long way from Home. In fact from here is a long way from any feckin where,” said Nora. “Well Nora, I would not put it quite like that but, country road take me home to a place I belong,  West Monaghan, Mullyash Mountain, take me home,” Alistair continued to sing. “Big wheels keep on turning, carry us home to meet our kin, sweet home Kelowna where the skies are so blue and Cockney Johnny has his car shop.  Lord, I am coming home to you,” sang Nora “Oh! look Alistair smoke.” “No worries Nora, that’s just fog,” replied Alistair. “Feckin right Alistair, fog coming from the front of the Shebeen” replied Nora. “Maybe I’ll pull over till the fog clears Nora,” said Alistair. I’ll make a nice cup of tea, shall I Alistair? That would be lovely Nora, said Alistair To be continued

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