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Day: February 8, 2012

Message from a Hostel – Back to the Future 19

Mr. Murphy could we hear from your client Mr. Alistair Shackleton Jones please before we start calling any key witnesses, asked the Magistrate.  The Court calls Mr. Alistair Shackleton Jones, shouted Harry. Mr. Murphy calling people to take the stand is the function of the Court Clerk, explained the Magistrate. Yes Your Lordship, sorry Mr. Court Clerk. Call away there, you have the floor, replied Harry the Liar. Well Mr. Shackleton Jones may I firstly ask are you any relation to Ernest Shackleton, said the Magistrate. Yes your Lordship my Great Great, Great Uncle on my father’s side and I am related to Tom on my Mothers’ side. replied Alistair. Tom Crean the Irish explorer from Kerry, asked the Magistrate. No replied Alistair, Tom Jones the singer from Wales. Well Mr. Shackleton Jones your Great Uncle was an honourable man and I am sure you are too; maybe you could recall the chain of events for the Court, asked the Magistrate. All I can say your Lordship is that what Doc has said is what happened and Mr. Murphy here needs to go back to Galway or to the Kings Inn and read more of his law books. Well Mr. Shackleton Jones I am inclined to consider this as an unfortunate incident, place £5 each in the Charity Box, case dismissed, said the Magistrate. Good man yourself Donald, shouted Harry. Mr. Murphy I would suggest that you take Mr. Shackleton Jones advice and return to your text books. Doc and Alistair had just left the court house when Nora and Hig arrived. Well Harry what happened, asked Hig. Case dismissed Hig, mistaken identity I had the whole matter under control, photo evidence and the whole nine yards, replied Harry. I was like Gregory Peck as Atticus Finch in to To Kill a Mocking Bird, Feckin Magic Hig, the Magistrate was baffled by my forensic evidence.  OK Harry my man good job but where is Doc and Al gone, asked Hig. Not sure Hig, the Doc called someone a Gobshite as he passed me and headed out the Court room door, replied Harry the Liar. I’ll send you the Jack and Jill Hig, said Harry. Let’s go and see if we can find them Nora, said Hig…… to be continued  

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